Finding a new rhythm

I have been staring into the distance for some time now, finding it difficult to start the writing process. I write a sentence, then erase it. I get up and move, stretch a little, and return to try again. Still no success. I am experiencing a mini ‘writer’s block’. It is a frustrating process to be going through.

Staring into the distance - an unfamiliar beauty

It is not that I am feeling stale or that the view is so boring that it deadens my thinking. In fact, it is the opposite. I am sitting in a garden in a totally new context and have been over-stimulated on both an intellectual and emotional level. I feel excited, over-charged and dreamy, all wrapped into one. All in all, it is an energetic state that does not seem to be conducive to creative writing.

In addition to this, I am having to deal with this unreasonable part of myself that is putting pressure on me to produce something meaningful.

I have so many thoughts and feelings to deal with, all crying out for attention at the same time. But all of this potentiality comes to nothing, since I find it impossible to follow a single train of thought in a logical way and to its natural conclusion. It seems such a waste. There is so much energy to harness, yet I have so little to show for it. I feel like a rugby team that has all the possession of the ball, yet is unable to translate this into actual points on the board. In such matches, you can get yourself into a dreaded downward spiral, where you work against yourself and become your worst enemy.

My usual pattern of when and where I do my writing has been disrupted. Disruptions are not always bad. In fact, I am experiencing a pleasant disorientation at the moment – I am in Richmond, Virginia, about 14000Km from my usual surroundings. I arrived three days ago and am visiting my son who has been living in Richmond for four years.

Since I am staying with him (and not in a hotel), I will have an opportunity to experience the community more intimately. Part of finding my new rhythm is to establish a routine of running. Running will offer me the opportunity to: (a) explore and absorb my new surroundings, and (b) allow my thoughts time to settle into a coherent whole. I am hoping that this will help neutralise any future writer’s block from developing. But maybe a more simple solution will be to just put my pen on hold over the next three weeks.

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One thought on “Finding a new rhythm

  1. No Ken, putting your pen down for 3 weeks is not the option, certainly not for you. In a day or two you will have so much to write that the 3 weeks may not be enough to say all you want (need) to say. Being away from home, in a new country/town, with your son who lives away from home will stir up profound thoughts and insights that we can learn from. And of course as the time comes to bid farewell, new, deep emotions wil stir. So no, don’t hang up that pen yet. Thnx JJ

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