Life does not happen in straight lines

A couple came to see me to help them deal with a relationship issue that always entrapped them, heightened tension and escalated anger and conflict.

During our session, I was struck by how they had become entrapped in a linear, causal explanation of the problem. On a fundamental level, each partner perceived the issue from a totally different, yet opposite experiential point of view.

• Her perspective: He drinks too much, is always out with his friends, and shows no appreciation for what I do for him.
• His perspective: She is always nagging and criticizing me, no matter how much I try to support her.

They both took on an external perceptual stance, by focusing on the behaviors of their partner to highlight where the problem was. In other words, each saw the other as being the problem.

When you take a linear perspective regarding any relationship issue, then you will (a) blame, (b) reject any ownership, (c) and justify and legitimize your own behaviors towards the other person.

When one takes an ecological perspective of an issue, one can see that the couple were actually caught in a never-ending, repetitive, circular pattern of nagging/drinking/nagging/drinking…This process restricts and drains one’s energy. In addition, little or no creativity and diversity of thinking can emerge since both parties will be defensive and on guard in their interaction with each other. This will then prevent them from generating new possibilities to resolve the difficulty. The relationship gets stuck on an information and energetic level.

During our conversation, I happened to mention that life does not happen in straight lines. This comment intrigued them and activated further exploration about what this actually meant.

Rakotzbrücke – In the reflection you see the circle

When you think of relationships from an ecological perspective, you will think of circles, waves, spirals and quantum leaps. Since relationships are unfolding process, there is no beginning or end. If you think there is a beginning or an end, then you will have conveniently punctuated or sliced a piece of interaction to create a linear cause-and-effect to suit your viewpoint.

In my experience when working with relationships, linear thinking is in itself a major problem since it is tacit, and seldom examined in reflection. Given this, I believe that adopting an ecological perspective is a necessary precursor in resolving any relationship difficulty, since you will have to acknowledge that you don’t stand apart from the problem. You are connected to it. You will also see a bigger picture of the pattern, by putting yourself in the shoes of the other person. This calls for sensitivity, compassion, respect, and humility.

Dealing with despondency

If you have experienced failure in any endeavour, you will feel the after-effect of despondency and despair. While failure and mistakes may be a normal part of the process of striving for success, dealing with failure nevertheless has a negative impact on one’s sense of self worth and emotional well being.

Failure chips away at one’s confidence, it erodes one’s self belief; it has the power to disempower. In such times, one gets swamped with feelings of despondency and despair.

I generally suggest a simple 3-step programme in dealing with these heavy, negative feelings.

Be gentle.

In times of failure, one usually adds to the despair by being over-critical and judgemental of self. Aggressive, derogatory self-talk usually follows the failure, resulting in feelings of resentment, guilt, worthlessness, stupidity and incompetency. This harshness creates more emotional pain. Being gentle with yourself helps you to stop adding more negativity. It also offers you a safe emotional space to engage in a process of resolving the despondency.

Be reflective and own the failure.

It is necessary that you go through an internal process of reflection to identify your part in contributing to the failure. Taking on responsibility is empowering. Move away from blaming others or any external factors. Instead, own your failure. Be reflective, step back and assess what in your perspective had caused the failure. This requires honesty with self. If you have others around you whom you can trust, ask for their perspectives. In the process, you are adding more useful and meaningful information to move onto step 3.

Be proactive.

Feelings of despondency usually immobilize one. Failure wants you to remain stuck; it wants to strangle; it wants to limit your possibilities. After gathering the necessary information regarding your part in the failure, it is necessary to start a process of ‘moving on’. A clear, yet simple plan of action is necessary. Start with small steps as a way to gain some momentum. Start slowly, there is no need to rush. Appreciate the little victories in this process, since this is the tough section of the process. You do not want to repeat past mistakes. Instead, you want to move forward with some slight changes in how you had previously dealt with the situation.

Unfinished business

On a fundamental level, we are all busy doing something with our energy and time. To achieve success in your endeavour, you will need to be dedicated and committed in your focus. This will provide the necessary structure and direction in which your energy can move.

When it comes to elite athletes and business, achievements and success are usually measured quantitatively. This can be termed the ‘finite game’, since there is always a score attached to this process. There is a clear, definite end goal that you may wish to reach. In business, for example, the end score is how much profit did you make? In elite sport, did you win or lose?

On another level, there is an ongoing process that is unfolding which falls into the qualitative domain. In this domain, there are no clearly defined and measurable goals. Instead, it is a never-ending game that depends on attitude, purpose, belief and the striving for perfection. It is all about the quality of your practice. More specifically, you need to question whether you are taking care of how you are going about your practice.

When it comes to perfection, you need to be mindful that perfection is a ‘doing’ word. Elite athletes know that one can never actually arrive at true perfection. This knowledge, which is based on years and years of experience, is not negative. It will also not hinder or negatively impact their performance. Instead, it will propel them into working more effectively as they strive to refine and improve their performance. Attitude and belief, drives their actions.

Achieving perfection is an illusion, similar to finding a pot of gold under the rainbow.

It is in the qualitative domain, that the process of mastery and the striving for perfection, exists. It is in this world that the ‘infinite game’ gets played. During this game, one will constantly have a feeling of unfinished business. This feeling is the fire or desire that propels you in wanting to do better.

Any practice should be seen as a work in progress. Striving for perfection is a journey that has no end point. Get used to this idea, if you want to improve your performance. In fact, fully embrace and accept this phenomenon since it will free you from your fears and judgements regarding how you are performing.

Master your practice

No matter your sport or business endeavour, you can move towards higher levels of proficiency (skills, techniques, knowledge), if you are willing to practice and practice. However, how you perceive this practice usually determines how you participate in the practice.

On a fundamental level, the process of practice should be enjoyable. It should not feel like a burden.

Practice should encompass a willingness to expand and grow beyond any finite end point. In this way, the process of practice is never-ending. The desire or motivation to continue indefinitely in order to overcome challenges, lies at the core of the process of mastery.

Challenges should not be feared. Instead they should be seen as opportunities to test yourself against yourself. On the most basic level, it is ‘you versus you’. More specifically, competitiveness is nothing more than striving to improve any aspect of yourself that you have decided on. This is an internal process. An optimistic attitude is necessary when tackling challenges, especially if the external environment is harsh with many ‘uncontrollables’. In such situations, it is important to be able to relax, especially under intense pressure or stress.

The expectancy of failure before doing anything, usually debilitates and demotivates. Fear of failure, fear of making a mistake, fear of being judged, are some of the obstacles that tend to reduce the desire and commitment to practise and compete. This results in internal resistance or immobilization.

Unfortunately, failure and mistakes are usually perceived in an undermining way since one has  attached them to one’s self worth. In such cases, failure causes internal pain which in turn makes you defensive, resulting in the need to psychologically protect yourself. Unfortunately, this will hinder your natural energy flow (physical, mental and emotional), which is required to help you achieve newer levels of mastery.

A new perspective of failure is necessary, if you wish to achieve higher levels of mastery in your practice. It is somewhat of a paradox, that failure and mistakes are actually a normal part of the process of practice. Normalizing failure helps you to keep perspective when you are under intense pressure to perform.

Failure is nothing more than a feedback loop. It is a piece of information about how you have responded in a certain situation. This piece of information is an integral part of your development and needs to be effectively utilized by you, as part of your journey to achieve mastery. Given this, try and not judge failure negatively. Instead, see mistakes and failures as meaningful information that can help you expand further.

The presentation and the paradox

The presentation was about to begin.

It was a dark night. Most attendees could not see. But this did not concern them since they had all got used to the dark which descended, whenever their so called leader delivered his rambling, nonsensical monologue. It was all too familiar. It was all so predictable. There was little or no intellectual foundation to anything that he said.

Most attendees were comfortable not to see. In fact, behind closed doors in private conversations, it was unanimously agreed that it was preferable not to look, since not looking would prevent seeing, which in a weird sort of way, could pardon them from taking on any responsibility for not challenging any comment, statement and decision that he may make. Further, not being able to see could be used as an excuse of that ‘we didn’t know’ when they would eventually be confronted with, sometime in the future, all of the evidence that revealed the incompetence, greed, narcissism and fear-mongering of their Destroyer-in-Chief.

Tonight, nature was not playing its part. The clouds lifted (much like curtains do at the beginning of a show), to reveal beautiful, refreshing light that radiated from the moon at the very moment that he uttered his first word.

‘I will keep you safe, I will protect you’, promised the Destroyer. ‘I have been your omega and saviour for four years, and now more than ever before, there is more need for me to keep you safe. The world is a dangerous place. There are internal and external threats that only I can protect you from’.

He had mastered the tactic of intensifying fear, as a way to hold onto his power and authority. It was a common tactic that all dictators used.

‘I have done a great job. Look at how well we are doing, I have created a nirvana where everyone is prospering. The numbers are great.’

He was a master of arrogance and ‘big talk’. His speech was vague, littered with sweeping generalizations so that he could create false verbal realities that in no way matched the reality that people were actually experiencing. There was such a disconnect.

Hours passed as the Divider-in-Chief ranted and raved. He had a captured audience for his one-man show; an audience that dared not utter a word, ask a question or disagree with anything that was said. But this was all too familiar – most of the crowd had ‘clocked out’, with eyes closed and voices silent.

During one of the rare moments when he paused, a courageous voice asked a question. It was not a confident voice, but it shocked the sleepy audience out of their slumber. They all knew that the wrath of the Destroyer would soon be unleashed. He was a master of twisting information around, of undermining and belittling any ideas or questions that were not in agreement with his.

‘But sir don’t you see the paradox?’

The question was asked respectfully but it riled the Destroyer. He demanded total allegiance and loyalty from everyone, not only from his sleepy audience. How dare anyone question his authority? He had already told everyone that he was a genius so why did this punk not listen?

‘That’s a nasty question, and you are a stupid person’, attacked the Destroyer. He was a master of intimidating tactics that unbalanced any opponent in front of others.

But this was no ordinary person who had posed the question. He was a tai chi master, who understood the nature of energy flow and the power of having a gentle, loving attitude to all things that he encountered. He was an integrative thinker, who understood the complexity of diverse ecological systems.

He stood in silence looking directly into the eyes of the Divider-in-Chief. He radiated energy that unnerved the Destroyer, who was still trying to make intellectual sense of the question that had been posed.

‘Don’t you see the paradox that totally undermines and destroys everything you say? And in the process, it will ultimately destroy you?’

Confusion reigned in the mind of the Disrupter-in-Chief. For the first time, he was now encountering a tai chi master who was skilled in the power of reflection.

‘Who has caused or is responsible for the turmoil that exists at present, which has unfolded on your watch over the past four years? Why do you escape into the future by creating more fear in the present so that you can promise to rescue the future, given the turmoil and chaos that exists in the present. How can you simultaneously be the savior and solver of future destruction, when in fact you are the source and the creator of present chaos?’

‘It is impossible for you to solve the very problems that you have created, unless of course you don’t believe that you have caused any of the chaos that presently exists in our country?

‘I have done a great job’, countered the Destroyer.

‘And therein lies the problem that prevents you from seeing the paradox’, concluded the master.

 

 

In awe

I stood in silence in the darkness of night.

I had just taken a photograph that had taken my breathe away. I felt in awe as I looked at the photograph. It had captured a story that reflected my life philosophy in my work as a psychotherapist.

My story:

The church, which should not be interpreted in a religious sense, reflects being grounded and anchored on earth. It shines brightly, yet is not able to move. It offers security in the darkness. It belongs on earth and is a manifestation of your creative endeavours. It also is the source of your philosophy and world view of life and how you want to live it here on earth.

The comet reflects your uniqueness as you journey in life. It is moving and radiates its light. It does not see its own light; yet its beauty is seen by others as it passes by. The comet also links you to your history. Scientists believe that the last time it passed by, was approximately 6000 years ago. It is believed that it will return again in around 6000 years time. Given this, it reminds you that every moment in time is special, since that moment can never be experienced again. A moment that is lost, can never be regained. Knowing this, remember that the present moment is all that you have – it is a gift to reveal your uniqueness and creativity.

The vast expanse above and the twinkling stars reflect the potentiality and creativity of your life. There are many possibilities that present themselves to you, as you journey in life. The stars can be thought of as ideas. And if you join some of the stars, it is like joining the dots when you create new meaning in your understanding. I have previously written about space in conversation.

The complexity of life encompasses these three dimensions. As you journey in life, be grounded and balanced. Be compassionate. It is impossible to see your own light, but others will notice it in the darkness. Join the stars in whichever way you may like to create new meaning in what you are experiencing or have experienced. Remember that there are many ways to join the stars. How you are going to interpret your experience, is your decision. However, remember that ideas need to be actioned so that they can manifest themselves on earth.

I looked up into the sky at comet Neowise in wonderment. My over-riding feeling was one of deep connection to the beautiful fabric of life and all of its mysteries.

 

 

Take care

Our illusion of feeling safe most of the time in our lives, has now been shattered.

For the first time, every single human being is realising and experiencing that we do not actually live in a safe world. We are all feeling vulnerable, uneasy and at risk.

Many of us are now saying or writing ‘stay safe’ or ‘keep safe’ when saying goodbye to loved ones or when ending emails to friends or business associates. While this highlights a high level of concern for the well-being of those we know and love, it also seems to suggest that the world was considered a safe place before the coronavirus outbreak.

For most people, the harsh reality is that the world has never been a safe place. War, poverty, abuse, corrupt government, racism, sexism, xenophobia, ageism, pollution, nuclear threats and famine have all resulted in the majority of human beings constantly feeling unprotected and unsafe (not to mention our wildlife and the environment).

For the first time, we are experiencing what a global crisis truly feels like. Global issues have no respect for wealth, status, political power or entitlement. We cannot buy ourselves out of this problem, or impose laws to silence protestors, or quieten the voices of the abused.

In this time of crisis, we all need to fully appreciate the intricate, interdependent fabric of life. Everything is connected. Someone’s poverty may be connected to our wealth. Someone’s pain may be connected to our pleasure. This is now a time to become more sensitive to the fabric of our relationships with others and our environment.   

As we grapple for answers and take stock of our lives, maybe we should try and align to one simple principle as we navigate our way through this crisis. And that is the principle of ‘taking care’. ‘Take care’ is an extension of ‘keep safe’.

Nibbling each other

Take care of yourself, take care of your family, take care of your neighbour, take care in how you interact with others. take care of the environment, take care of birds and animals, take care of anything that you are connected to.

The foundation of care is gentleness, respect, gratitude and humility. In this regard, you are no better or more important than anyone or anything else that is living on our planet. ‘Take care’ counters arrogance and entitlement. 

We are living in uncertain times, dealing with many unknowns. However, as a collective it is not necessary to intensify and escalate fear. Instead of worrying about your safety, rather commit yourself to taking more care of anything that you are in relationship with. 

There is no need for the government to protect you and keep you safe. This is an illusion. If they had the power or the honest desire to keep you safe, then why do they start wars, abuse power, avoid global issues or selfishly only look after themselves? 

While your primary responsibility is to keep yourself safe, now is the opportunity to expand this into taking care of the living fabric that exists around you. As we move through this global crisis into the future, the challenge is to make our new world order a safer place for everyone and everything to live in.

Paradoxes, borders and runaways

Since my first post dealing with the impact of coronavirus, the death rate in the USA has increased from 93 to 217 (average of 32 deaths a day), while deaths related to the ‘gun virus’ have increased from 8144 to 8460 (105 deaths per day).

The whole world now seems to be in lock down, with border closures preventing the movement of people. In addition, many towns and cities are ghost-like as people have gone into self quarantine, and bunkered down. The family system has now also closed its borders to the outside world.

Over the past week, our global system has gone on a runaway in its efforts to deal with the coronavirus. We have never experienced such a challenge before. We are in an unbalanced state as the domino effect kicks in on all levels of society. When one country closes its border, another follows, with the rest following rapidly. This cascades down further, within each country itself. If one restaurant closes, the domino effect kicks in and the rest follow. If one sporting code decides to cancel a season, other sporting codes follow. No one wants to be seen to not be responding. While these decisions might be imposed by government or reached by the respective institutions, a runaway gets triggered. This is the process of how a system implodes.  

Runaways are activated when a system loses its ability to self regulate and to be in balance. Extreme actions and excessive gyrations of extreme reactions are activated as processes get unleashed that impact all levels of the system. Everything that constitutes and defines the system is affected. In this regard, it is interesting to watch the financial markets, since they reflect these uncontrollable swings in a system that is on a runaway.

This runaway is usually internally triggered by an unhealthy system that needs to change.

Rushing for water

In time, systems do eventually find a new equilibrium. Ecological systems have a deep wisdom of their own. We need to trust this. New patterns of interaction, new ways of thinking and acting start to emerge as the system searches for a new balance. In the process, the system undergoes a significant change.

Many paradoxes come to the fore when dealing with ecological crises. The reason why paradoxes emerge is that the interdependence, interconnection and circularity of processes that exist in a system, have not been fully understood or respected. Further, these delicate interconnections are not always evident when a system is in equilibrium. In fact, a healthy system seems to function and evolve effortlessly, with checks and balances in motion.

Limiting the movement of people, and reducing contact with others by creating social distance, is the most effective way to tackle any virus (not only the coronavirus). However, the closure of borders (within countries, societies and families) has created a world that feels so unnatural and strange. The imposed restrictions go against our deep need to connect and to feel a sense of belonging with others, since loving touch and physical contact with others is a vital part of remaining healthy.

Closing borders between countries is a necessary global response, but in doing so we are in fact experiencing, first hand, the sort of world that nationalistic, populistic leaders are advocating for, in times when there is no global crisis. The closing of borders in the present crisis, however, does not mean that we are fighting each other, but rather paradoxically we are working with each other. It is not a ‘them versus us’ response. In this regard, we are all in the same boat, existing in our closed political and social systems.

As families close their own little borders, separating themselves from the wider community, internal stresses unfold. As parents try to work from home, work and family dynamics may clash. The line between doing work and dealing with family demands, gets blurred. Depending on the developmental stage of the family, parents will be stressed further as they may need to take on educational duties in order to keep their children busy and stimulated. Allocating time for work, play, study, leisure so that the family system can fully function, is a fundamental challenge for parents during this time. New patterns of interactions and routines will need to be found as the family experiences the challenges of blurred boundaries between work and family demands, fun/play time and ‘school’ time, exercise time and quiet time. This may require parents to work while children are sleeping, which in turn eats into their ‘sleep’ time. This could result in fatigue as time goes on, as the family has only its own internal resources to call on.  

At the moment, the medical system is under severe stress and is vulnerable, since no vaccine has been developed yet, to treat the virus. In time, however, the scientific and medical system will ‘catch up’ in its understanding and in the process find the ‘formula’ to treat coronavirus effectively. Until then, we need to wait for science and medicine to unravel the ‘complexity’ of the virus. As we wait, we will encounter our own stresses as we try to deal with the abnormality that every country finds itself in.

A man made cloud

 

Suspicion and a dark place

Fear thrives on the unseen, the unknown and the uncertain. Given this, it is understandable that there is so much panic about coronavirus.

Since my last blog article (posted yesterday), the number of deaths in the USA due to coronavirus has increased from 93 to 116 (23 increase), while deaths due to the ‘gun virus’ had increased from 8144 to 8247 (103 increase).

Yesterday a young friend came to visit me. As I interacted with him, I became aware of a feeling of suspicion. I also became aware of his discomfort as he spoke to me. He probably was also feeling suspicious of me. The suspicion was wrapped up in a fundamental question of: ‘I wonder if he has the virus?’. He was probably thinking the same of me. In our conversation, I was also judging how close or far I should be to him as we spoke. This was an interesting feeling for me, which highlighted the impact that coronavirus was having on our relationships with others.

This morning I was invited to the home of an 82 year old friend to listen to some classical music that will be played by a couple of her other friends. She told me that there will be  5 people at her home.  I spontaneously accepted her offer, yet after saying goodbye I have been having second thoughts about my decision. Again questions of trust and suspicion about who would be there, and where had they been and whether any of them would have the virus.

In talking to her, she made an interesting comment about the virus. She said it came from a ‘dark place’. On further reflection of her comment, she did not actually mean that the virus came from a dark place, but rather how we as a collective have responded to it and in particular the anxiety, fear and panic that we carry around with us.

Comfort

Given these two human encounters over the past day,  I have reflected on how best to move forward in my human contact with others. This is what I have come up with:

1. We are all in the same boat together. Your panic and anxiety is no different from anyone else you encounter.
2. Consciously try and relax and lower your panic when interacting with others. Since we are energetic systems, this will help others to relax more.
3. Move out of the ‘dark place’ and lighten up a little. Be kind, smile more, laugh more. Laughter and humour have been scientifically proven to boost the immune system, improving health and well-being.
4. Keep a safe physical distance (which you need to gauge), but do not shy away from emotional closeness and speaking about vulnerabilities and worries with others.
5. The fundamental panic around the coronavirus is the worry about death. This creates deep fear, since the ego continually tries to repress and avoid thinking about it. Constantly remind yourself to live each day as if it was your last. Fully embrace every moment. Smell the roses, listen more intently, look at detail around you, engage all of your senses more acutely. Wake up to the present unfolding moment.
6. In your spare time, connect to activities that bring you joy. Read more. Exercise more. Take on responsibility to be both emotionally and physically healthy. With this healthy energy, your interactions will be enhanced.
7. Keep perspective.

Each one of us will respond to this crisis in our own personal way. Become aware of your anxiety (which is understandable), but do not relinquish your own personal power to make a meaningful impact in your interactions with others.

At present the sun is shining brightly in Germany. I have the gift of some free time and have decided to go for a long mountain bike ride. Enjoy your day.

 

 

Keep perspective in the panic

The Panic

The world is in a panic about coronavirus.

It is scary when group panic intensifies. People cannot think straight. Common sense gets thrown out of the window and weird behaviour occurs, such as hoarding excessive amounts of toilet paper. While this seems laughable, it may reflect a metaphor that has the fundamental message of that ‘we are in deep shit’.

One of the major difficulties in dealing with coronavirus is that it is a global issue. By nature, global crises cut across borders, and require an integrative approach to resolve them. In this regard, the coronavirus is similar to the global warming crisis that science has been flagging for us for a number of years now.

The Political Response

In the initial stages of dealing with the outbreak of the virus, politicians escalated the panic by comments that had not been carefully thought through. Statements were made without any scientific backing, coupled with more and more talking in an attempt to correct past inaccuracies. Instead of calming and reassuring people, politicians added more fuel to the fire. Unfortunately, there are not many politicians who are systems thinkers. Politicians such as Trump, for example, have no understanding of the interconnected and interdependent nature of global issues. In his national address, the public and media sensed that he was out of his depth in dealing with this crisis. The result? More panic, and no confidence in his leadership. 

A new day, a new beginning

The Scientific Response

One has limited understanding of the nature and complexity of any virus in its infancy stage. There are many aspects of a virus that need to be researched first, before a clearer picture emerges. In this regard, viruses are one step ahead of the researchers. In time, however, the scientific system is able to unravel the complexity of any virus. So in this regard, our scientific system will in time, offer us deeper understanding and also resolution of the crisis at hand. 

A Simple Comparison

Statistics about the (a) contraction, (b) spread and (c) mortality rates of a virus need to be carefully examined. Due to its chaotic, fractal and exponential nature, viruses are notoriously difficult to monitor. Given this, it is important to question statistics and not to assume that whatever statistic is presented to be representative of the actual reality.

While I do not want to downplay the potential threat of the coronavirus, it is interesting to note that if you live in the USA, you may have more chance of dying from a gun than from coronavirus. While I know that viral contamination can increase exponentially, depending on movement and contact of people, and you cannot compare oranges with apples, I would like to do a simple and crude comparison of the number of deaths caused by guns, to the present mortality rate of 93 deaths from the coronavirus in one month

At the time of writing, there have been 4748 reported cases of coronavirus in the USA, 4569 people are in mild condition, 12 people are serious and there have been 93 deaths (https://www.worldometers.info/coronavirus/country/us/).

In 2019, https://www.thetrace.org/2020/01/gun-deaths-2019-increase/ stated that there were 15,292 gun fatalities (excluding suicides) in the USA. That translates to 1275 deaths by gun per month.

As of 17 March 2020, the Gun Violence Archive reports that in 2020 there have been 8144 deaths through gun violence (5082 were suicides). This translates to 3257 deaths by gun per month (if you include suicide). 

While the comparison of ‘gun virus’ with coronavirus is not actually statistically possible, I wanted to do it in order to put the present crisis into some sort of perspective. 

Keeping the chicks safe, as they cross the road

Keep Perspective

A global crisis disrupts a system on all levels. Financial, political, social, educational, medical and scientific systems all are impacted, each in turn, affecting the other. A system in crisis can respond in paradoxical ways to ‘injected’ help from the outside. Take the US Federal Reserve Bank, for example. After cutting the interest rate to zero in an attempt to offer financial assistance to the market in distress, the NYSE dropped 10%.

With regard to the coronavirus, we are all in the same boat together. Due to the nature of the virus, the decision to close borders and to encourage everyone to keep some social distance and limit social contact is necessary. On another level, it offers all of us the interpersonal space to pause and to take stock. It also allows time for the dust to settle, and for us to gain a better perspective of what is unfolding. In a panicked state, one loses perspective. We become blinded and are unable to step back to reflect on the process in a logical way. The mental challenge is not to get ‘contaminated’ by the social drama and the propensity of people to exaggerate during times of crisis.

The coronavirus surfaced quickly and has disrupted the established order of life. It is now time to pause. Things will never be the same again. Unlike the ‘gun virus’, the coronavirus has created unprecedented panic on all levels of our global system. A new order is wanting to emerge and this paradoxically, may be the systemic gift resulting from coronavirus.